ADHD

Understanding ADHD with Compassion and Nuance

Neurodiverse Affirming Therapy

It is very difficult to talk about ADHD without acknowledging the description "disorder" in the title. Having said that I and many others do not believe ADHD is a disorder but a naturally occurring variation in human neurology, like having green eyes or being left-handed. 

What is ADHD

ADHD is simply a different way of functioning in a world not designed for neurodivergent brains. It’s not a "deficit" but a unique wiring that affects executive dysfunction, attention regulation, energy management, and how the brain processes motivation, time, and stimuli. Think of it like having a high-powered engine with bicycle brakes— it requires different tools to navigate smoothly.

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People with ADHD often have brilliantly creative, hyperfocus-capable, and innovative minds, but struggle with systems built for linear, consistent productivity (like school, 9-to-5 work, or rigid schedules). Their brains are interest-driven rather than reward/punishment-driven, which can make traditional expectations feel exhausting or impossible.

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Different Expressions of ADHD

ADHD isn’t one-size-fits-all. Broadly, it’s categorized into three presentations (though many people fluctuate between them):

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1. Inattentive Type ("Quiet ADHD")

   • Often misses details, drifts in conversations, or struggles with follow-through.

   • May seem "spacey" or forgetful (losing keys, zoning out during tasks).

   • Frequently misunderstood as laziness or apathy—when really, the brain is overwhelmed by too many inputs at once.​

2. Hyperactive-Impulsive Type ("Big Energy ADHD")

   • Restlessness, fidgeting, or impulsive actions (interrupting, thrill-seeking).

   • Often labeled "too much" or disruptive, especially in childhood.

   • This isn’t intentional; it’s the nervous system seeking dopamine (a key neurotransmitter that helps with focus and motivation).​

3. Combined Type

   • A mix of both inattention and hyperactivity—the most common presentation.

   • Energy and focus may feel chaotic, swinging between hyperfocus and burnout.

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Common Struggles 

Clients with ADHD often face challenges that go far deeper than distraction. These can include:

• Emotional Dysregulation: Big feelings that come on fast and hard (rejection sensitivity is very common).

• Executive Dysfunction: Knowing what to do but feeling "stuck" (e.g., wanting to start a task but physically unable to initiate).

• Time Blindness: Losing track of hours or underestimating how long tasks take.

• Shame Cycles: Years of being called "lazy," "flaky," or "too much" lead to deep self-criticism.

• Burnout: Overcompensating for ADHD traits drains energy reserves (masking is exhausting).

• Sensory Overload: Lights, sounds, or textures may feel intolerable (ADHD often overlaps with sensory processing differences)

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Strengths 

While therapy often focuses on challenges, ADHD also brings gifts:

• Hyperfocus: Deep dives into passions (when engaged, productivity is unmatched).

• Creativity: Out-of-the-box thinking and problem-solving.

• Resilience: Navigating a neurotypical world builds adaptability.

• Bigheartedness: Many ADHDers are deeply empathetic and intuitive.